My beloved spiritual children in Christ Our Only True God and Our Only True Savior,
CHRIST IS IN OUR MIDST! HE WAS, IS, AND EVER SHALL BE.
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HOW TO CONDUCT ONESELF WHEN PEOPLE SPEAK EVIL OF US?
[Source: "Orthodox Life," vol.48]
Our good name is very important for us in life. A "good name is rather to be chosen than great riches," says the wise Solomon (Proverbs 22:1). A good name brings us the respect and trust of others, and we have great need of it in life because no one wants to have dealings with a dishonest person. Therefore we cannot look indifferently on the opinions of others about us. The dishonest person can expect neither heartfelt compassion nor help from others. If we are entrusted with any kind of leadership role, it is almost impossible to control subordinates while lacking the respect of others.
So, what should we do when other people, slander and deprive us of our good name?
1. First of all, no matter how bad and how injurious the evil talk spread about us may be, we must guard ourselves from anger, verbal abuse, and revenge, but remain as placid as possible in spirit, because we all must be of one spirit with Christ, and Christ, in the face of all the accusations from the Jews, remained peaceful, not in the least bit vengeful. "Christ, when He was reviled, reviled not again...but committed Himself to Him that judgeth righteously," the holy Apostle Peter says (1 Peter 2:23).
2. When you hear that others are speaking poorly of you and ascribing to you vices of various sorts, bad intentions, and so forth, then immediately subject yourself to the strictest examination to see whether the vices they ascribe to you are really there. Perhaps they say you are proud, a liar, an idler, a spendthrift, a drunkard, a sluggard a debaucher, or whatever else. Examine yourself very closely: do these vices actually lurk within you, if only to a small degree? Is there not pride, falsehood, and so on? Other people's eyes often see our conduct much better and more reliably than our own do, because every person has a certain amount of pride, and pride always conceals us from ourselves. Thus, we can rarely see ourselves accurately, and some people, even quite depraved ones, consider themselves faultless. If impartial examination of yourself shows you that others reproach you justly, that one or another vice indeed exists in you, then quickly offer repentance, fervently pray to the Lord God to deliver you from that vice, try zealously to correct yourself of it, and then everywhere show the most sincere friendly disposition and gratitude towards the one who spoke evil of you, regardless of his intentions for doing so, because without reproach you perhaps would never have seen your vices, would have died without repentance and correction, and would have perished forever.
3. If, after the most attentive, impartial examination of yourself, you find that the vices ascribed to you do not exist, you may legitimately defend yourself and refute the slander leveled at you, but only when this is necessary not because of your self-love or pride but because of your position in society. But defend yourself calmly, without anger or indignation. Jesus Christ Himself acted thus when they said of Him that he was driving out devils with the help of Beelzebub the prince of devils (St. Luke 11:15-26).
If the evil talk about you does not cease, or even multiplies, then resort to nothing but fervent prayer that the Lord God may have the kindness to enlighten and correct your slanderers. Act this way because Jesus Christ Himself acted this way even towards His executioners. (St. Luke 23:34). (Orthodox Heritage)
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"Glory Be To GOD For All Things!" - Saint John Chrysostomos
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With sincere agape in His Holy Diakonia (Ministry)
The sinner and unworthy servant of God
+Father George